Shotgun Grandma: Volume 1 Sample

Chapter 1

“A Killer Beginning”

 

The coffee house was in chaos. A girl with dyed red hair and a nose ring worked the register, while a teenage boy with a fresh case of acne ran back and forth from the espresso machines to the counter. The girl wore a smile, but it didn’t hide the underlying stress she was likely experiencing. The pair of workers were barely treading water. The line of customers backed up to the front door and the drive-thru wrapped around the building and into the street. 

Murmurs, laughter, and the chimes of numerous phone notifications filled the crowded shop. The noise fueled the headache scratching at the surface of Meghan Hall’s skull. She needed her caffeine.

Meghan checked the time on her phone, growing impatient. She had been in line for almost twenty minutes and it was already 8:17; her exam started in less than fifteen minutes. She would’ve bailed after seeing the line, but she wasn’t about to take her statistics final without a mocha latte first. No caffeine guaranteed a poor grade.

The lobby grew uncomfortably warm with so many bodies packed so tightly, and the morning sun beaming in through the windows did little to help the situation. Meghan wished she would’ve woken up early enough to have taken a shower, but after a late night; she let herself sleep in. So today was a beanie day. The long-sleeve button up and tights weren’t helping either. Meghan decided that this was her punishment for waiting to schedule the final until last minute, leaving her with a Saturday appointment.

As miserable as she was at the moment, it could have been worse. Meghan was happy that the aroma of coffee overpowered the other smells that could fill the room instead. For instance, the guy in front of her looked particularly raunchy. He was big—a bodybuilder type—maybe in his thirties, wearing a gray hooded sweatshirt with dark sweat stains ringing his armpits and back. Sweat beaded on the ends of his matted hair. He either had the workout of his life, or he was dying. Meghan figured she didn’t want to be downwind of him either way.

“Let’s go!” a man cried near the front of the line. “Some of us have actual jobs to get to. How hard can it be to make a cup of coffee? The machine does it for you!”

Meghan rolled her eyes at the comment, though she too was in a hurry.

The red-haired girl behind the counter gave the man a sharp look. “Dude, chill. We’re doing the best we can. We’re a little short-staffed today.”

The acne-ridden boy was clearly feeling the pressure. He ran back toward the register, a cup in each hand, neither of which had secure lids. His hip caught on the counter and both coffees spilled over his hands and onto the floor. The scolding liquid made him cry out, and he dropped what was left.

A chorus of moans and curses filled the storefront.

Meghan couldn’t help but feel the same way. She was already pushing past the time she needed to make it into class, given there was no traffic on the way.

“Nice one!” a boy yelled from behind Meghan. The comment brought a few snickers from the line.

The boy turned bright red, probably both from the pain and the embarrassment.

The red-haired girl bent down, picking up the two cups and said something to the boy. Meghan couldn’t make it out, but the girl probably told him to go wash up or get a medical kit because he soon disappeared into the back.

“Look,” said the man who had first issued a complaint. “I’ll give you fifty dollars to just get me my coffee right now. That should be enough money for a fresh piece of metal to stick in your face. What do you say?”

Meghan leaned over to catch sight of the man. He looked like someone’s dad. He wore a bright blue polo with black dress pants, and a phone clipped to his belt. His dark brown hair was full and combed to the side. He didn’t dress well enough to look like someone with a superiority complex, but then again assholes come in all shapes and sizes.

“I’d say to get bent, dude,” the red-haired girl said. “Go get your coffee somewhere else.”

About that time, the sweaty weightlifter in front of Meghan fell to the ground. He didn’t even try to catch himself. He just dropped straight down, his body slapping on the tile floor.

Meghan jumped in surprise and backed away as an older woman rushed to his side.

“Jesus Christ!” the asshole dad said. “This place is a shit-show. Have fun with that,” he added, pointing at the weightlifter on the floor. “I’m going across the street.”

The girl behind the counter ignored him and leaned over trying to see what the commotion was. “Is he okay?” she asked.

An older woman wearing a pink breast cancer awareness shirt had her fingers at the big man’s wrist. Her eyes went wide as she shook her head. “You need to call for an ambulance. I can’t find a pulse.”

The red-haired girl froze in place. She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing coherent followed.

“Now!” the woman in pink yelled.

The barista shook herself out of her stupor and quickly disappeared into the back, leaving no one at the register.

A small circle formed around the man on the floor, and Meghan stayed back, watching intently. Her final be damned… it’s not like she didn’t have an excellent reason to get out of it at this point.

“Ridiculous,” the asshole dad muttered as he skirted his way through the crowd.

That’s when the big man opened his eyes and began to move.

“Oh, thank God!” the older woman said as the sound of amazement went through the small circle of onlookers. “Are you okay?”

Then the man did something unexpected. He grabbed ahold of the woman’s arm and then took a huge bite. When he tilted his head back, he revealed a sizeable chunk of raw, sinewy muscle clenched between his teeth.

The woman screamed as she tried to pull away, but the man didn’t let go of her. A large crimson pool formed on the floor between them as blood spurted from the woman’s open wound.

The rest of the crowd broke into a panic. Most people fled for the door screaming, but a few others courageously started kicking at the man, trying to get him off of her. The asshole dad pushed past Meghan, throwing her to the ground.

Her head bounced off of the hard tile floor, blurring her vision as her eyes filled with tears. She could feel people tripping and stepping on her, heading for the door. Fear gripping her, she tried to get to her hands and knees, but someone’s knee collided with her ribs and the pain sent her crashing back down.

Thankfully, someone grabbed a hold of her hand, trying to help her up. She kicked her feet, trying to use the support to stand up, but whoever had grabbed her pulled her back down. They pulled her closer to where the carnage was happening instead of helping her escape.

When Meghan looked behind her, it was the weightlifter that had a hold of her. He was no longer concerned about the older woman, who had managed to free herself and was now being rushed out of the door.

Meghan tried to pull her arm free, but the man was incredibly strong. “Please, let me go!” she whimpered.

Half of her hand found his mouth, and then pain lanced through her arm as his teeth clamped down.

She heard herself screaming, but it felt so distant… like none of it was even real. She felt like she was floating above the entire scene, watching herself endure the horrific act of being eaten alive. Everything seemed so small from up there; the need for coffee, the test… none of it really mattered.

She heard a snap, and more pain came. Her screams were still the muted cries of someone else in her ears.

A wet chewing sound rose above the screams. The smell of coffee still filled the air, though now there was a metallic undertone.

Soon, the pain receded completely, and Meghan felt nothing as she drifted into darkness.